First Chapter Review: A Daughter's Love by J.A. Tran
I recently picked up this book as free Kindle download. It is currently selling for $2.99.
BLURB: Richard Garcia is a police officer in Dale, North Carolina. He has seen a lot in his profession, but he has seen even more in his personal life. His wife died while giving birth to his daughter, and twelve years later, he loses his little girl to Leukemia. He now lives his life in seclusion, burying himself in old photo albums and memories of the past, closing out everyone around him in the process.
Julie Halloran is a business woman from New York City who is trying to escape the big city life, and find a place to truly call home.
When the two meet, their lives will be changed forever.
COVER: Honestly not what I expected, but because Richard spends a fair amount of time out on his boat, the dock makes sense.
FIRST CHAPTER: Police officer Richard Garcia enters the courtroom to provide testimony in a breaking and entering case. He quickly looks to escape back home where old photos and sailing on his boat bring back memories.
KEEP READING: This is intriguing so far. I'm not sure if this breaking and entering incident is important, but it could be. It's good the author started the reader out in the action. I'm not fond of stories that start off in first person without the identity of the person being known, but it worked okay here because once Garcia takes the stand he has to recite his name and rank.
Though the reader doesn't know much of Garcia's story yet, she knows he enjoys being alone. He craves it. You don't know why without looking at the book blurb, which is fine for now. The memories of the daughter are nice touches, even though it's odd Garcia describes the little girl to the reader as if he doesn't know her, saying the picture is of "...a little girl with beautiful brown curly hair, just long enough to barely touch her shoulders." I guess this is supposed to be mysterious, but if we're in Garcia's POV, I think he would say, "It was a picture of my daughter..."
The author also follows a good rule of the male lead and female lead seeing each other in the first chapter. They haven't met, yet, but you know by the blurb she will be important.
The book definitely needs editing. I found several places where commas were missing, other areas where they weren't necessary, and a missing word. I'm still curious enough to continue, but if the errors get too distracting then I probably won't go further.