Beginning by comparing God’s view of adultery to society’s view, No Innocent Affair explains in frank yet loving terms that unrepentant adultery is more than just an innocent affair. It is choosing Satan over Jesus and death over life.
Most important, No Innocent Affair takes you on a step-by-step biblical progression that leads to the sin of adultery being forgiven and salvation reclaimed.
Why Adulterers Cheat – How to Cure the Incurrable by Edward Mrkvicka Jr.
“Narcissistic personality disorder is a condition in which there is an inflated sense of self-importance and an extreme preoccupation with one's self.” (Healthline.com)
Let’s review a few of the symptoms of narcissism as they pertain to adultery:
A Narcissist….
1. Takes advantage of others to achieve their own goals: Adultery takes advantage of and hurts innocent spouses and children and is indulged solely for personal gratification.
2. Is preoccupied with fantasies of ideal love: Adulterers, having made the fatal decision to betray their family, can literally think of nothing except their new “soul mate.” Once that relationship collapses, which it almost always does, they go from one adultery to the next, never finding the true love they say they so desperately seek.
3. Requires constant attention: Adulterers are high-maintenance people. As they put themselves first in all things, they find it hard to believe that others don’t have the same reverence to what they perceive to be the natural order of things.
4. Disregards the feelings of others: One woman told me, when questioned about her numerous adulteries, that she had a right to be happy. It never occurred to her and others like her, that in any decent society, no one has a right to be happy at the expense of others.
5. Lacks empathy: There is probably no single emotion more devastating than betrayal, especially when we are betrayed by the person with whom we shared deep personal intimacies, and who promised to be faithful until death. But an adulterer never thinks of the consequences to others. Simply put, they just don’t care, as all their emotions are directed inward.
6. Pursues mainly selfish goals: Adultery is nothing if not pure selfishness. It is the worship of self to a degree that it is unfathomable to most of us. As a society, we’ve tried everything to make adultery acceptable and hip, but that doesn’t change the truth -- even the adulterer knows what they are doing is wrong, which is why they lie to cover their tracks.
Narcissists, blinded by their selfishness, commit adultery without being able to see the danger. When they finally come to understand they’ve taken a wrong turn in their lives, usually after they are caught, they invariably turn to the medical profession (psychiatry) that quietly admits that there is little it can do, as there is no cure for narcissism.
The good news is, it is impossible to be a narcissist and a practicing Christian at the same time. They are mutually exclusive. Psychiatrists and psychologists cannot cure our choice to be selfish at the expense of others, but God can and will.
Edward Mrkvicka is a lay minister and counselor, life-long Bible student, and award-winning Christian author. His efforts on behalf of families, understanding adultery, and the devastating effect of divorce on children have earned him a United States Certificate of Special Congressional Recognition “in recognition of outstanding and invaluable service to the community.” His most recent book, No Innocent Affair: Making Right the Wrong of Adultery, is available at bookstores and Amazon.com.
You can visit Edward’s web site at http://www.edwardfmrkvickajr.com/ and find him at Facebook here.
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