Friday, June 25, 2010
How to be Happy and Successful in Everything You Do! by Terry Drake, Author of Live Happily Ever After...Now!
Today's guest blogger is Terry Drake, author of the self-help book, Live Happily, Ever After... Now!.
Live Happily, Ever After… Now! uses age old, time tested secrets (found in NLP, Law of Attraction, Positive Psychology, and Hypnosis) to teach you how to create the life you want! Ask yourself: Are you in control of what you think, act and feel? Are you living the life you want? Would you like to be happy and successful in everything you do? The key is learning how much control you have over your life, your beliefs and attitudes about yourself, others and the world you live in. Once you understand that you are in control (and you will), then you can use the 9 simple steps to begin living the life you want.
How to be Happy and Successful in Everything You Do! by Terry Drake
What do all successful and happy people have in common?
They believe in themselves and their ability to accomplish whatever they want. Not everyone shares this belief about themselves and the world they live in. Several people actually believe the exact opposite about themselves, even though they experience success and happiness, they are unable to fully enjoy it, because they don’t believe they deserve it or that it won’t last or that they got lucky. Your beliefs can prevent you from doing the things that you want and enjoying the things you want, yet even though they are this powerful, they are completely under your control.
Yes, you are in full control of what you believe about yourself and the world you live in! The problem is you don’t fully understand this or how your beliefs were developed, so you don’t challenge or replace them and live as if they were true. In order to be happy and successful in everything you do, you have to first believe it’s possible and to do that you need to understand more about your belief system.
Your Belief System
The most interesting fact about your belief systems are that they developed during your childhood. Before you even entered adolescence and adulthood, your fears, concerns, and thoughts about yourself and others were already formed. You developed these by your interactions with the adults and peers who were involved in your life.
An example of how an un-useful belief is formed is as follows: A three-year-old child wants attention from his father, so the child jumps on his father’s lap and interrupts him. The father’s response is, “Hey, what are you doing?” followed by “Not now I am busy. Go bother your mom!” The child of three then internalizes this experience and tells himself that he is not good enough for dad. Then between the ages of 3 and 6 this message is reinforced by the father and other adults. The message then becomes, I am not good enough and should keep quiet. The boy begins to believe this and live as if it were true, maybe forever, or until he learns differently. This, most likely, wasn’t the message that the father wanted to pass onto his son. However, you must remember it was a young child who was processing the information. The messages you received throughout childhood affected who you are today. These messages were interpreted by you to mean something and that meaning was solely based on the self, because early in life it was all about you; how you felt about a message, then how it related to you, and finally how you fit into the world because of the message. Whether the message had a positive intention or was an act by an unhealthy adult taking advantage of a child, the child’s perception was internalized, processed, and the message shaped how the child thought about himself and others.
Once you have your beliefs, they will shape the choices you make and the chances you take. These beliefs become quick messages that automatically play in your mind when you think about making changes or trying new things. When the messages are un-useful they result in your being unsuccessful and unhappy. So to summarize it up, you are currently limiting yourself, based on thinking that was developed as a child and reinforced by the same thinking, resulting in your current attitude about yourself and the world you live in.
The ease in changing this
Your beliefs and the way you approach life has become habitual. Think about it, most likely you approach your various day-to-day activities with an already pre-programmed belief and attitude. Take Monday’s for example, how many of you dread Monday’s? Why? Have you ever thought about it? What has Monday ever done to you? Nothing, it is just a word that is used to label a day of the week and is most often recognized as the start to a new work week, the same as Friday, except Friday is the label for the last day of the traditional work week and most of you view Friday’s in a much different manner.
You have full control over how you think and feel about Mondays, but you first have to realize this and once you do you can pay attention to the reason you feel that way. Once you understand the reason, then you can challenge and replace it, finally practicing your new found belief about Mondays and this will lead to a new attitude about Mondays. In order to break a habit, you have to become consciously aware of it, understand it and then replace the behavior and practice the changes until it becomes permanent. Healthy and positive beliefs plugged into any scenario will result in different results. Beliefs will affect your thinking, attitude, and actions determining how feedback is perceived. Most importantly is the simple fact that you have control over all of these aspects, especially your beliefs, once you understand them.
Live Happily, Ever After… Now! Helps you understand how much control you have over your beliefs and gives you simple, yet concrete methods to change them. The reason you can do this with ease, is that you already use the same methods to get your current results, you just don’t fully understand how the process works. Once you understand the whole process and how much control you have over it, then it is just a matter of implementing the changes and practicing them, which the book also teaches you how to do.
Terry M. Drake is a Licensed Social Worker, National Board Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist, Certified Trainer of Ericksonian Hypnosis and NLP. He has spent the last 15 years learning about himself and others, through his academic studies resulting in his MSW and his professional studies, as a family therapist, clinical supervisor and vast training and research into hypnosis, neuro-linguistic programming, the law of attraction and positive psychology. Terry is currently a Director of mental and behavioral health programs and a Life Coach, Hypnotherapist in private practice. He is also ready to put his skills to use as an author, speaker, consultant and coach. Terry lives in Wellsboro, Pa with his wife and children. You can learn more about the power of your mind and how to be happy and successful in everything you do, by visiting www.livehappilyeverafter-now.com and buying his new book, Live Happily, Ever After… Now! 9 Simple Steps to create the life YOU want!